And Luke was supposed to be my exception! He was - he IS - my exception! Except even for as much as I took care of him and kept him safe, I still had to watch him get taken from me three times, even in Kyriakos, even in a place where I should have a chance at keeping things normal for once! He's the only way I found any damn reason to be happy again, and I screwed it up because even though I had chance after chance, even though I begged, I still couldn't save him!

[A break, his voice cracking and expression tight with anger. It takes him a moment to gather himself again.]

I have to wake myself up every morning to that, Roxy. I have to fight myself. I detach. I want to vanish and hope for something that isn't my life. But I still choose to try. Because I refuse to return to a world without him, and the only way to do that is if I'm still alive and around to try and fight for him.