thevoidsdarkhorse | Heart Game (Continued)

Heart Game (Continued)

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[What's funny is that's honestly debatable with how Homestuck works.]

I should have!

I ignored my teammate, I ignored what so many people were saying, and I shouldn't have because then maybe I would have seen what was in the rules sooner!

So learn from it!

But don't blame yourself. Blame the Echo who ran this dumbass excuse for a game instead. 'Cause if it wasn't for that? None of this would've happened. Even if you had stayed quiet? Teams still would've died. If the Yaksinis hadn't been assholes, though, nobody would've had to.

...

So it's not... It's not your fault. Please, just don't blame yourself for this.

There's always assholes. I'm suppose to...supposed to stop them.

And you tried.

You're allowed to not be perfect at it, you know?

[She scoffs.] I know I'm not.

And that's okay!

You're allowed to make mistakes. You're allowed to not always succeed. As long as you keep trying... That's what matters.

And if I get people killed?!

How many people do I have to have die around me before I can just give up?!

Well, that's where the whole learning from past mistakes part comes in. You'll get better at it.

Haven't yet.

But you will. I know you will.

[She just looks away from him, staring at the bodies.]

You don't believe me.

No.

I don't.

...Well if you don't think you can get better, I guess you must think I'm pretty hopeless myself, huh.

Haven't seen a lot of failure from you.

Really? I'm failing pretty hard right now. Light's knowledge and clarity, right? You'd think that'd mean I'd have some idea how to help you out here.

Besides. You're a goddess, you just don't have all your pieces back yet. Far as I know? I'm just some kid who can play with fire.

I didn't want to be a goddess. I don't want it, don't want this power, don't want ANY of it...

You help your friends. You protect 'em and lead 'em and know how to use your powers to help others. People like you and what you do.

You're amazing.

Then why can't I help you feel better?

Because I'm a horrible person.

You're not a horrible person! You're one of the nicest people I know. You're always trying to help people out. I'd be completely lost if you weren't around.

And if you believe in me so much... Why can't you see how much I believe in you?

[I would say "this would be 'Believe in me who believes in you!' if he knew his universe's local Gurren Lagann expy", but did you know that only (...well, "only") came out in 2007 while he's from 2005...?]

[If only you could so she could have all those Dirk pings.]

...because I don't know why you do.

Cry Wolf is one of the most nightmareish things people deal with in Kyriakos and I hid it. I caused it because I didn't listen to my teammate. Because I was selfish and afraid.

I don't know how I can make someone not lost or...or anything.

Wanna know why I believe in you?

It's because you're my friend. Simple as that. And even if they mess up sometimes, friends are always worth believing in, no matter what.

....

You know...I tried to do it in the rules. I acted off. I made it clear I was upset. I approached my friends, acted high strung and upset and basically just tried to scream 'I'm a wolf, I don't let on this panic unless I got a reason.'

...but I was too good of a liar. It was too early for most to even suspect that I watched what I said and did as much as I do. Sure a lot comes out that's stupid, but more often I'm watchin'.

Gets even worse because like two peeps picked it up. That I was too upset, but they only knew after it was too late.

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