thevoidsdarkhorse | Heart Game (Continued)

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From:

menially

[And bringing her knuckles to his lips, briefly.]

The kindness I could share with you wouldn't ever be enough to thank you for your friendship, Roxy. Even if it's hard to take at times, or if it's hard to give in return. But I help you for the same reason you want to help me. And I'm sorry, that my pushing you away has caused you pain like this.

But as long as I know you, know that I won't stop being here for you... or doing my best to let you do the same in return. Let you give and take.

You've earned every drop of that.

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

[She stares at their hands, quiet for several long moments.]

It...took a long while. To know for sure, you cared. 'cause I'm kinda fucked up like that. But...I did see, understand it. So I know you'll be there.

[She looks up at him, questioning.] Will you really let me be there for you?

From:

menially

Sure I will.

[A pause, eyes softening.]

I'm not always great at speaking my mind about it. It doesn't always feel important or necessary. So many other things could be done instead of dwelling on feelings, you know? That's why I never talk about it. It always seems like a waste of everyone's time.

That's... what I've thought for a while, anyway.

[And thumbing the fabric with the BIG FUCKIN HEART ON IT because yeah. Yeah, hi, look, what a dumb aspect except he's starting to get the WHY now.]

So, I'm sorry if I'm a little slow at learning this. It's not what I'm used to. I'm going to get angry. I'm going to want my space.

But... at the very least, I can always use someone to sit with. [A light smirk, sheepish but restrained.] Gets kind of lonely after a while.

Edited (what the fuck are even words idk) Date: 2015-01-27 06:33 am (UTC)

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

[She's quiet for several long moments and there's a flickering.] Yeah, it can be kind of lonely.

[Sitting on the roof on LOPAN with Dirk, various times with teammates, Hydra, Fade, out in Kyriakos. How peaceful it felt. How things seems just a bit more manageable.]

[She squeezes his hands.] Wouldn't want you to be lonely.

And...I'll try to be patient. I'm just...y'know, kind of fishhandsing a lot. Never been good at finding that right middle point. But I won't give up on ya if you're willing to not give up on me.

From:

menially

I came in here to help you for a reason, you know.

[That smirk broadens a bit, softer, a more comforting happiness even if it's tinged with a sad sort of heaviness. It's hard, and already he has to fight to keep himself honest in the moment, habit wanting to rearrange the topic and shut out every strength that his Aspect was offering...

But he knows now that it's just as hard for both of them.]

I won't give up on you, Roxy. You have my word.

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

[She smiles, gentle, genuine, eyes whining a bit with tears because it's...a relief and so good to HEAR.]

Is it all right if I hug you? Dunno why you're fine, but kinda wanna take advantage of it, y'know?

From:

menially

[He nods, giving a sympathetic sort of laugh as he lets her hands go and opens his arms wide. Yes yes and yes WHO KNOWS WHEN I'LL MANAGE THIS EVER AGAIN.]

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

[Yes, this is also true.]

[You are getting more Roxy hugs.]

From:

menially

[I have missed Roxy hugs.

Holding her tight.]

Heh. We're quite a mess of a duo, aren't we?

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

[If only you could get more. '^']

Yeah. We are.

From:

menially

[IF ONLY miracles could happen right

He'll hold that for a long while before leaning his weight back, a hand steadily on her shoulder.]

Be patient with yourself, too, alright?

It's never an easy thing to accept, seeing someone make choices that you wish you could change. You're working hard with plenty of people. But...

[Drifting off for a moment, before pulling out the martini glass and handing it to her.]

...Sometimes, it's better to let those around you realize things for themselves. Be there for them, and never give up on them. But let them find their own strength.

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

[IF ONLY.]

[She stares at the martini glass, and slowly taking it.]

...is that what you think this was?

Edited Date: 2015-01-28 04:22 am (UTC)

From:

menially

From my perspective, at least. I was always worried for you.

But regardless of my involvement, intentional or otherwise, you still chose to change on your own. Not because anyone told you to do it, or pushed you until you gave in. That's important. It means something to you that way.

So... it's only fair to think the same of others, too. Even if it's hard to have to watch and wait.

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

...

[She holds out the glass.] You might want to keep this then.

It has a meaning for you, but to me....it's how I should listen to when people are showing concern for me. Even if I changed on my own, I wouldn't have managed if I hadn't finally listened.

I dun want to mix your messages.

From:

menially

...If you're sure, then... alright.

[Making a sylladex switch. NUMBERS EVERYWHERE much strider very dave. He pulls out the pen instead.]

I'd still like to make my mark here, if I could. Would feel guilty if I didn't at least try.

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

It would be a shame to get this far and then ya contradicted yourself 'cause heart symbolism.

All right.

From:

menially

Yeeeah, that'd be a little counterproductive. Thanks for saying something.

[A gesture to her journal.]

May I?

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

Yeah, thought so.

[Slides it over to him.]

From:

menially

[Writing most of what he said before down, though condensed.

Be patient with yourself.

Keep being there for others, even if it's difficult. Let them come to conclusions themselves. Don't take on that burden alone. Voice what you need to the people you care about.]

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

I'll try to remember.

Dun be afraid to take your own advice though, okay?

From:

menially

You're asking a coward to not be afraid, you know.

[An empty laugh, before his smile grows a little more honest.]

...But yeah. I'll try, too.

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

Everyone gets afraid, you know.

[She smiles fondly.] That's all I ask.

From:

thevoidsdarkhorse

[Now you stand in front of a tall building.]

TG: thats the lab
TG: need to get on the roof
TG: theres a ladder down
TG: n also
TG: be a good friend

[And then it disconnected.]

[Which might be a bit vague except you can now also see a figure standing in between you and the building.]

[It’s Roxy. Standing there in a t-shirt, skirt, and leggings, her mother’s scarf wrapped around her. In her hand is a piece of glass covered in blood, her own clothes stained the same. Around her are bodies. The bodies of her friends and Rose.]

[She looks over her shoulder at you, and she’s smiling, but her eyes are empty. She turns to you, and perhaps you’ll realize the blood is HERS. She’s covered in jagged injuries, but nowhere vital. Those spots are covered in bands of tiamt-with-black, a vibrant red, three different blues, and green. She holds out the shard of glass.]

Kill me.

From:

menially

[It's that same rush of discomfort, of familiarity so nauseating that he visibly fights the urge to buckle over. But to right himself, seeing her injured, empty, and asking for death--

Anger stiffens his motions as he strides up to her, grabs the shard... and drops it as he backhands her hard across the face.]