thevoidsdarkhorse | Heart Game (Continued)

[Oh.]

[So.]

[This is what a hug from a human feels like.]

[She leans against him, wrapping her arms around him, and....relaxes.]

[It takes him a minute to also relax. But the Heart makes it easier to refocus on what's important here: the girl in his arms. When she lulls in his arms, he's hugging her close, holding her tightly so the blanket envelops both of them - a cocoon against the cold and empty outside these walls.

After a moment, he starts to hum - bits and pieces of a lullaby he himself was soothed to, all by the person who he thought could chase all his fears away when he was small.]

[She closes her eyes, relaxes more, the tension melting away. It's soothing, hearing the sound. Like the recordings from her mother.]

[The house feels warmer, less empty than it was before.]

[And suddenly you're back in the Neighborhood with all the fire, on the street now.]

[There's a building collapsing near you, and an injured Carapacian is trying to get out of the way of it.]

[Just running and diving may not be quick enough to save it unscathed.]

[...Mood whiplash like whoa but NO TIME JUST GOTTA REACT

At least said whiplash means he has an EXTENSIVE pool of emotional high from ten seconds ago to throw forward a shield over the lizard....insect....thing. GO GO GADGET MAGIC FEELINGS DEFENSE.]

[SORRY BRO.]

[Exoskeleton alien dude.]

[YOU HAVE MADE A FEELINGS SHIELD> You can get the Carapacian to safety!]

[Rolling forward and snatching the little guy with one arm and the shield with the other, holding it as firmly as he can above them in case there's any additional rubble.

And he... knows talking won't change anything with these guys, from what Roxy's told him, so.

OFF WE GO, ALIEN DUDE.]

[Well.]

[Yeah, just carrying the dude is legit.]

[He's flailing, but hey, you're out of the rubble!]

[YEAH gonna stow the SHIELD (10 = 1) and... try to ease poor alien's flailing with a pat on the chest. Yes, everything is on fire and disaster, but he needs you to calm down, please!!!

Sensing the lab again, if he can, and heading that direction.]

[You are a third of the way there now! Huh, that's a lot closer.]

[Carapacian is failing, and oh look, you can understand it.]

"Everything is on fire and everything is dying!"

[Yes, yes, he can see that! More chest pats. Please, calm down, we are going to try to go somewhere safe where the fire can't reach us!]

[Oh.]

[Oh, you know a safe place?!]

[The Carapacian calms down with this information. It is now ready to follow you.]

[Minion get?]

[MINION GET..... I GUESS.

We will find the safe place together, little friend. Just no more flailing!]

[He will flail less. He seems far more relaxed when given direction.]

[Roll a ten sider, don't repeat.]

[2!]

[And now you're in another thing. A probably terrifyingly familiar thing. It appears to be the husks or a burnt out village, chilly and cold.]

[And you're told you're a wolf. You see the rules and if you're not lynched the first night, you'll have to choose a team to die.]

[But you can't. You can't you can't you can't.]

[You do everything and anything you can without breaking the rules. Act off, act upset, act so not you and hope, pray, wish someone will NOTICE and vote for your team and kill you off now because you can't, you CAN'T kill someone else. You can leave people, but you can't kill another team deliberately.]

[But it doesn't work. Worse, is both teams that are up are not wolves.]

[And you're panicking, terrified, and you don't want this. You want to end this game, BREAK IT, and if you just break the rules....it'll kill you and one other team.]

[But the team you're closest too are either like minded, or likely to be chosen to be lynched this round.]

[You, Technic, find yourself on a stage. Everyone is looking at you.]

[Do you confess?]

[...It's a horrifying memory, one he knows only from the perspective of one of those two risked teams. There was never any way to break it. Never any way to truly win. It was cruel and torturous.

But he still squares his shoulders, digging his nails into his palms as he steps forward to confess.

To try to change what happened would only be torture.]

[The vines come, they wrap around you, and the teams are still up, still going to DIE without any mercy, and it's guilt and horror, and you already hate yourself, but you could deal, you could deal, you could fool yourself into thinking you could deal-]

[Except it keeps going. Epona confesses, and it would be a lie to say part of you hadn't predicted that, that they would cave under your confession, that maybe it was a hope to end the game more quickly even if thought filled you with self loathing, but when you could have dealt before, but not now, because it doesn't end.]

[It doesn't end it doesn't end it doesn't end and you have started a chain reaction of people refusing, or breaking rules, and everyone is dying dying dying and it's EVERYONE and it's all your fault, because you see it now. You see it's in the rules now, and you should have seen BEFORE, but you DIDN'T.]

[You see everyone die, see all the people you KILLED because of your own incompetence and fear.]

[He has to actively fight against that rush of emotions, detach himself and ground into his own emotions with gritted teeth. She might not have known, but NOBODY knew, EVERYONE was fooled...]

Goddamit, Roxy, it wasn't your fault!!!!!

It was.

[And oh look, there she is, sitting on the ground amongst all the dead, vine covered bodies, staring at them all with dead eyes.]

Like hell it was!

[SOMEONE'S MAD but it's a passionate anger out of hurt and fear, knowing that this line of thought will just dig her into a grave and bury her alive with guilt.]

Don't tell yourself such stupid things, you idiot! You're not some all-seeing psychic! You didn't know! NONE of us knew! Don't go convincing yourself you had any fault in this when all you did was take the first step!

You are NOT a killer, Roxy!!

[She flinches.]

I'm not supposed to be. I'm not supposed to be a killer, it's not who I am, but...but they...

Us dying was not preventable, Roxy! As much as we all wanted it, someone had to die for that damned Echo to be satisfied. Even if you had stayed quiet and played along, how many people would have been killed?? It was rigged no matter what we did, you can't talk yourself out of that---!

[Augh, you know what.

Biting back a swear before falling to his knees in front of her and GRASPING her. Anger is his push now, his fuel past the fear.]

You couldn't save them, I know you couldn't save them, and goddammit, I know it hurts to see it again. But the only person who hasn't forgiven you is you, you idiot.

[Burying his face in her hair]

I forgive you. I forgive you, Roxy. Please. Find some forgiveness for yourself.

[It's like a shock because YOU DON'T TOUCH ME ANYMORE, but here you are. Touching me. You're hugging me and yelling and it's all THERE. In his words, in the movements of his body, and the fact he's DOING this.]

[She's still, eyes wide, staring over his shoulder in shock because how. How, how, how could anyone forgive her, she hurt so many, she knew games, and it was HIS team she hurt directly, but he still]

[Still]

[She sobs. After Cry Wolf, she refused to take the comfort. This time, her comes up to cling to him instead.]

[It's better than emptiness or looking at herself through such deadened eyes. He won't let her go. Not until she's cried it all out.]

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

1/2

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE

Re: RAGE